Well I may have discovered the reason! God's been speaking a lot, and doing things in my heart lately, so I have some interesting things to share with you. Generally they are things that I don't want to share, because they are my flaws and I honestly don't want you to know that I'm flawed, even though you do. I don't want you to have the intimate details of what those flaws are so that you can see them clearly, or even challenge me to change in those areas. However, in keeping with the effort to be open and honest, I'm going to tell you anyway, though it makes me very nervous to do it. And on an extra note not particularly related to the first, I will say that I was right about my dear Lord and King being excited about it, because I am too. He's given me a beautiful gift tonight that I've been telling him I wanted, and I know he's terribly and wonderfully joyful to give it to me now.
I'll start with the first thing listed, that seems reasonable right? Although maybe I should go backward... No, I'll start in the boring, unoriginal, in order fashion. Original is overrated anyway right? Ok, so here we go, brace yourself for impact! Humility has been a large theme of the semester, and the Lord has been pressing in on me the entirety of what that means for me. There is a lot that I could say about that. When it all comes down to it, I am much more prideful and selfish that I give myself credit for. I have a terrible tendency to fain modesty about my abilities when I know that I am good at what I do. I have to say that I think that is worse than regular old boasting, because it's also a lie and very misleading in every fashion. Anna confronted me on that earlier in the semester, and Aaron did too, although I don't think he knows it. With Anna it was one of those moments where I had to make a decision to (a) lie and say "No I don't do that, what are you talking about?" or (b) see it in myself and say "You're right, and because you have told me this because you love me and want to see me grow I am going to do something about. I'll make a change." I chose the latter option, with great difficulty. So I've been trying to own up to my abilities more this semester since then. It's hard to change a habit like that.
Then, more recently, the Lord has been bringing to my attention other things that co-inside with humility, and deal with "death of the self". Well, you may ask, "What the heck does that mean? Are you talking about suicide, because I don't think I can handle reading a blog in which you clearly say that you are going to kill yourself." Never fear! Death to self has nothing to do with suicide, and I'm quite happy living ;) Death to self me giving up every self centered desire and impulse you have. It is crucifying selfish ambition, self-reliance, self-deprecation and a whole lot of other self words. If it has self in it, you can probably count on it being not good and needing to die. As Christians all of our focus, and our hearts desires should be for God. The Lord has been revealing to me that I have no been focused and desiring after him, I have been focused and desiring after me. Let me tell you, that is rough to hear from your First Love. When you realize that you've stopped loving your First Love so that you can love on yourself, you know you're in a bad place. God was kind to me in the way he told me this. I'm reading a couple books by some great authors and the chapters I was reading in both of them "just happened" to be talking about this as I was reading them. Then I've also been reading in my Bible, at curiously the same time as these particular chapters in the books, about the same thing! Coincidence?... Come on, be realistic! Even if you aren't a believer you have to think that's kind of odd.
I've been thinking about this and what it means for me as a leader, and as a servant, and as a missionary to Serbia for 6 1/2 weeks. I don't want to do anything else until I fix this within myself. Obviously that's not going to happen over night, but with some dedication and prayerful help I can kill the monster that is my self. I'm excited about the prospect, even though I don't want to deal with it because it's going to be hard. Lets face it, nothing in life is easy. I was telling Anna today when I met with her that for me hearing God's voice is easy, it's following it that's hard. As I say all this, I hope that your mind is reeling with the idea that you could be in the same place. If you connect with this, don't turn away and pretend like this isn't you. I love you and I want to see you grow, so face it and deal with it, even as I deal with my stuff. We'll do it together and support each other. And if this doesn't connect with you, I challenge you to ask God the most difficult question: Lord what do you want to change in me? What is not right in my heart that you want to see changed and devoted to you? How do you want to purify and sanctify me? Those are tough questions because if you ask him for that he will answer, and the answer isn't usually much fun. It's worth it! Do it! For the sake of the people who need you, do it. When you better yourself, or rather allow God to better you, yours chances at actually helping some on drastically increase. Don't be afraid, and don't resist God, and he will be gentle with you. If you resist he might be more aggressive with showing you the worst parts of you. Gentle is better.
Now, the second part is equally, if not more exciting! Part of my struggle with humility is that I really want to lead. I have something that I can give to someone, whoever needs it, and I want to share it but with out being in leadership it's really difficult to do that in an efficient manner. And I have told the Lord this, that I want that responsibility, I want to take care of people, and I want to speak words of life into their lives and help them see who they are in Christ. I want to do more than I am doing now. Then I decided to be patient and trust him to give me that when he thought I was ready. I am excited to say that I don't have to be as patient as I thought I was going to have to be. The Lord has given me the greatest opportunity to serve as a co-leader on the prayer team for JiB! I am sooo excited! So I think that is what the Lord was pulling me about and what he was excited about, that he was going to give me one of my greatest desires. How awesome a gift is that to have to opportunity to lead people in prayer, which leads to healing, which leads to the major spreading of the gospel! It is so rock on! I'm stoked! I get to lead with Elizabeth, which will prove interesting because she and I are very different, and not in a bad way. We'll provide an excellent balance for each other and be able to teach one another many things in the semester to come. Isn't this awesome! God's gonna use me! I'm gonna get used =D <--- remember my happy face =D
And that is all my fun news, the good, the bad, and the pretty darn ugly. What is God pulling you at? Have you figured it out yet? Sometimes it takes a while, but even if you haven't found the pull he has surely been doing something that you've noticed. What's he been doing? No, I really want to know, do tell, I love it =D
Friday, April 27, 2007
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
What's the Dish Silver Fish!
I love being random, just in case you couldn't tell. I have no idea what the title means, but it has good rhythm and it rhymes, so I'm happy =D <--- see that's my happy face =D
I honestly don't have anything in particular to post about tonight. I don't have any marvelous revelations like I did last week about this time, or any amazingest stories to regale you with. My thoughts aren't particularly well put together either unfortunately. I feel so boring! Last semester was this incredible time and this semester seems to have just flown by with out much to show for it. I feel like I didn't do anything this semester, nothing worth doing anyway. Like maybe I got caught up in myself even though that is exactly what I aimed not to do.
I feel as though I wasn't as involved this semester with Crusade as I could have been, I didn't do enough... but that's not really true either. Truth is I've done everything this semester that I did last semester and missed a couple events because of snow. Snow is irritating that way. Seems as though I've missed something, something important. I missed making a difference some where. My desire has been to serve and encourage, but have I done that really? I suppose, but only a few could say.
I've been able to minister to friend who has found herself in... three or four, now, rough situations. Most of which she didn't get herself into. I can't even begin to tell you what a joy it has been for me to offer her what little wisdom the Lord has granted me to give to others. I haven't had that kind of opportunity since I moved to Pueblo, two years ago next month. Holy cow! I've been here two years! Who'duh thunk it. I find so much joy in helping people, encouraging them and lifting them up. I used to prophesy over people, that was fun. I don't do that anymore due to an unfortunate and rather doubt planting confrontation with someone that I love. But there was something to that which was amazing and joyous. To listen to God say how much they loved so-and-so and then tell them. It fires me up and gives me life and passion. To tell someone that they can be strong because God is strong in them and he loves them, and he's with them. To watch a person's strength grow even as you speak to them.
But I didn't see what I expected to see this semester. I expected to see God do more, which is certainly not to say that he hasn't been doing anything. We have tons of people coming to JiB now, it's been incredible! God has definitely been working. Chelsea, my dear friend, has grown enormously since I met her last semester, and she is this beautiful, radiant young woman of God. She is not nearly so timid as she used to be, she has confidence where she didn't before, and purpose where is was lacking. She's so much stronger now, as a believer, a lover of the living God. But there were people that I really expected to see something incredible happen with, and it didn't. Did I expect too much, or just not what God had planned on? I know for certain his plans and mine are very different most of the time.
I don't know, but I feel the Lord pulling at me like he wants to do something, something he's all excited about. Like "hey, come look, come look at thins". Or like my nephew who runs up to me "Auntie K! LOOK!" which by the way is really adorable. Maybe this is it, what I've been waiting for expectantly. He's finishing the semester out with a BANG! I know how he loves to come in at the last minute and do something fantastic, maybe this is it. What do you think? What is God about to do?
What about you friend? What is God doing in your life that he hasn't done before? Do you feel him pulling you? I can guarantee it with out a doubt that he is. When the King pulls one member of the body, the whole body moves. Did you know that in order for you to walk your head moves first, ever so slightly, but your head starts the motion forward for you to be able to walk. Your whole body follows the slight pull of one part. God does the same thing. So if he's pulling at me, how is he pulling at you? We'll have to pay attention together =)
I honestly don't have anything in particular to post about tonight. I don't have any marvelous revelations like I did last week about this time, or any amazingest stories to regale you with. My thoughts aren't particularly well put together either unfortunately. I feel so boring! Last semester was this incredible time and this semester seems to have just flown by with out much to show for it. I feel like I didn't do anything this semester, nothing worth doing anyway. Like maybe I got caught up in myself even though that is exactly what I aimed not to do.
I feel as though I wasn't as involved this semester with Crusade as I could have been, I didn't do enough... but that's not really true either. Truth is I've done everything this semester that I did last semester and missed a couple events because of snow. Snow is irritating that way. Seems as though I've missed something, something important. I missed making a difference some where. My desire has been to serve and encourage, but have I done that really? I suppose, but only a few could say.
I've been able to minister to friend who has found herself in... three or four, now, rough situations. Most of which she didn't get herself into. I can't even begin to tell you what a joy it has been for me to offer her what little wisdom the Lord has granted me to give to others. I haven't had that kind of opportunity since I moved to Pueblo, two years ago next month. Holy cow! I've been here two years! Who'duh thunk it. I find so much joy in helping people, encouraging them and lifting them up. I used to prophesy over people, that was fun. I don't do that anymore due to an unfortunate and rather doubt planting confrontation with someone that I love. But there was something to that which was amazing and joyous. To listen to God say how much they loved so-and-so and then tell them. It fires me up and gives me life and passion. To tell someone that they can be strong because God is strong in them and he loves them, and he's with them. To watch a person's strength grow even as you speak to them.
But I didn't see what I expected to see this semester. I expected to see God do more, which is certainly not to say that he hasn't been doing anything. We have tons of people coming to JiB now, it's been incredible! God has definitely been working. Chelsea, my dear friend, has grown enormously since I met her last semester, and she is this beautiful, radiant young woman of God. She is not nearly so timid as she used to be, she has confidence where she didn't before, and purpose where is was lacking. She's so much stronger now, as a believer, a lover of the living God. But there were people that I really expected to see something incredible happen with, and it didn't. Did I expect too much, or just not what God had planned on? I know for certain his plans and mine are very different most of the time.
I don't know, but I feel the Lord pulling at me like he wants to do something, something he's all excited about. Like "hey, come look, come look at thins". Or like my nephew who runs up to me "Auntie K! LOOK!" which by the way is really adorable. Maybe this is it, what I've been waiting for expectantly. He's finishing the semester out with a BANG! I know how he loves to come in at the last minute and do something fantastic, maybe this is it. What do you think? What is God about to do?
What about you friend? What is God doing in your life that he hasn't done before? Do you feel him pulling you? I can guarantee it with out a doubt that he is. When the King pulls one member of the body, the whole body moves. Did you know that in order for you to walk your head moves first, ever so slightly, but your head starts the motion forward for you to be able to walk. Your whole body follows the slight pull of one part. God does the same thing. So if he's pulling at me, how is he pulling at you? We'll have to pay attention together =)
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Who are you?
It's a question I often want to ask people, even people I've known for years and years. I'll be talking to them and just have the sudden urge to say "Who are you ____?" (fill in the blank with proper name). Not in the sense that I don't know who they are, I've known them long enough to know who they are. At least on the surface. But who are they? Who does God say they are? How did he make them that he didn't make anyone else? WHO are you? Not just your name, or what you like to do or what your favorite sports team is. Who are you really? Well I've never asked anyone that question because I know that I would have to have an answer for it as well, and I've never had one. The fact is I haven't known who I am, I know me pretty well I think, but not completely.
Tonight my dear brother Chas had his senior recital. God bless him, I love him so much. He is such an amazing man in every way, he's been a huge blessing to me and influenced me more than I like to admit, but always for the better. While he was playing tonight I shut up long enough to listen to him and while I was listening to him play the Lord decided to jump in while I was not paying attention to myself and say a few words. So I owe you, Chas, a big thank you for playing tonight so that I could shut up long enough to let God say something incredible.
He (God) was telling me about singing. Now he's been pressing it on my heart lately how important it is for me to sing to people. I don't know how to go about that, but it's important. I don't sing for people though, I'm very shy about singing for anyone. My own boyfriend doesn't hear me sing anywhere but in my car when I feel like no one is paying attention. You see, singing is the very heart of me. Music is what my soul is made of, and it is the one part of me that is the most vulnerable and I don't share it because I want to protect it. I will share my life story with you and never leave out even one gruesome detail. If you really want to know I will share with you every wonderful thing I've done, and every horrible sin I've committed. I will tell you and give you anything you want, but sing for you... not a chance. And he told me tonight that he wants people to see the heart of me, and that it's important that I show it. It's important for the Serbians that I do... how crazy is that to think about.
If I tell you about my life and who God has made me you'll see my heart, but only a glimpse of it. You'll never know me that way because I'm not really being vulnerable with you. I am to some extent but not completely, and that's the plain the truth, something I don't like to admit. But when I sing to you, my songs... that is a very different story. What I sing is truly a part of my soul. It is all my desires, hopes, dreams, thoughts, ambitions, and all my love, care and mercy. It is who I am entirely. And there is a lot there to give.
I wrote a song recently and recorded it. I gave a copy to my Anna-Belle and one to Chas. That is one of the hardest things I've ever done. I gave it to them to critique it, which made it even harder, because it's an evaluation of me essentially. I did get a review from Anna, I haven't heard from Chas but there hasn't been much time to ask. That song is a part of my soul, it is the nearest thing to who I am except for one. The other isn't really even a song yet, it's a poem I wrote probably three years ago and just haven't gotten a tune for yet. That poem is me, plain and simple. I can't even explain it to you because it isn't really about me, either of them. They are both about the Lord, but the meaning behind them is the cry of my heart.
So I believe that when the Lord made me he sang me into existence. He didn't just mold me or make me, he sang a song and there I was, radiant and beautiful just as he designed me to be. I have an answer to my question now.
Who am I? I am the Lord's Song and his Music Maker.
Who are you?
Tonight my dear brother Chas had his senior recital. God bless him, I love him so much. He is such an amazing man in every way, he's been a huge blessing to me and influenced me more than I like to admit, but always for the better. While he was playing tonight I shut up long enough to listen to him and while I was listening to him play the Lord decided to jump in while I was not paying attention to myself and say a few words. So I owe you, Chas, a big thank you for playing tonight so that I could shut up long enough to let God say something incredible.
He (God) was telling me about singing. Now he's been pressing it on my heart lately how important it is for me to sing to people. I don't know how to go about that, but it's important. I don't sing for people though, I'm very shy about singing for anyone. My own boyfriend doesn't hear me sing anywhere but in my car when I feel like no one is paying attention. You see, singing is the very heart of me. Music is what my soul is made of, and it is the one part of me that is the most vulnerable and I don't share it because I want to protect it. I will share my life story with you and never leave out even one gruesome detail. If you really want to know I will share with you every wonderful thing I've done, and every horrible sin I've committed. I will tell you and give you anything you want, but sing for you... not a chance. And he told me tonight that he wants people to see the heart of me, and that it's important that I show it. It's important for the Serbians that I do... how crazy is that to think about.
If I tell you about my life and who God has made me you'll see my heart, but only a glimpse of it. You'll never know me that way because I'm not really being vulnerable with you. I am to some extent but not completely, and that's the plain the truth, something I don't like to admit. But when I sing to you, my songs... that is a very different story. What I sing is truly a part of my soul. It is all my desires, hopes, dreams, thoughts, ambitions, and all my love, care and mercy. It is who I am entirely. And there is a lot there to give.
I wrote a song recently and recorded it. I gave a copy to my Anna-Belle and one to Chas. That is one of the hardest things I've ever done. I gave it to them to critique it, which made it even harder, because it's an evaluation of me essentially. I did get a review from Anna, I haven't heard from Chas but there hasn't been much time to ask. That song is a part of my soul, it is the nearest thing to who I am except for one. The other isn't really even a song yet, it's a poem I wrote probably three years ago and just haven't gotten a tune for yet. That poem is me, plain and simple. I can't even explain it to you because it isn't really about me, either of them. They are both about the Lord, but the meaning behind them is the cry of my heart.
So I believe that when the Lord made me he sang me into existence. He didn't just mold me or make me, he sang a song and there I was, radiant and beautiful just as he designed me to be. I have an answer to my question now.
Who am I? I am the Lord's Song and his Music Maker.
Who are you?
Friday, April 06, 2007
M-I-S-S-I-S-S-I-P-P-I
I don't know why but I just really like to spell Mississippi. It's fun, it has a certain rhythm to it =) Ok, so I got back almost a week ago and still have not posted about it! Shame on me! If you have no time and can't read the whole post I'll shorten it for you: Mississippi trip=AMAZING <---and for anyone who reads this and actually went on the trip will actually understand the full extent of what that means lol =)
Ok, so the long version, which won't be that long because the whole week just ran together and I can't remember what we did when, and I don't have much time to do this anyway. So hear goes.
We caravanned (sp?) to Miss. with three vehicles and had just a major blast getting down there. We drove straight through and the one stint that I drove, through Dallas Texas, I got lost for an hour. That was an adventure. If you are a Dallas driver I have this to say to you: SHAME ON YOU! GO TO ANOTHER STATE AND LEARN HOW TO DRIVE! I have never had to deal with such rude and aggressive drivers, it was irritating. But also fun because it was an adventure. The highway system there is seriously a total labyrinth, if you don't live there, there is no way you're going to find your way around. It was pretty incredible.
So we got to Camp Gospel Sunday afternoon, about an hour before we had planned to be there and had sort of an orientation and then spent the rest of the day on the beach. We were only a stone's throw away from the beach, it was fantastic. The water there is soooo warm, lots of jelly fish, no sharks, it was good. Later on in the week I went with a group of the guys all the way out to the post that said "Danger (something else I don't remember)" on it, that was fun. I think the drop off point was right around there. It was like a quarter or so mile out in the ocean and the water wasn't above my head yet. You know what a feat that is right? When I go to the pool five feet deep is pushing it for me keeping my head above water.
Monday we started working. We had such a large group between the Colorado Springs UCCS people and the Pueblo CSUP people (and a few from Boulder too), that we had to split up the groups. There were 36 of us total and we split up into two groups of 18. One group went to New Orleans (which ended up not working out, but you'll have to talk to one of them to get the whole story, it was pretty awesome), and then my group stayed in Pass Christian and pulled nails all day. Now pulling nails doesn't sound particularly exciting, I know, and honestly it was pretty monotonous, but this guy that we were doing it for had found all these boards that were just going to be thrown away and decided to keep them because it was such a waste. Well, once all the nails are pulled out (there was a lot of wood, we spent all day there and got through maybe a quarter of it), he is going to build a house for himself and his daughter and anyone else that needs a new house. Sweet huh? So it was worth it.
Tuesday my team went to New Orleans to do the house the other team was supposed to do on Monday but couldn't. We had to gut the entire house, it was quite an experience, especially in the not-so-safe neighborhood that we were in, with the "crazy" neighbor. The neighbor was the most interesting part of the house, he was ranting and raving the whole time we were there, it was a bit scary, so I stayed away from him. We ended up leaving the house unfinished, but we came back Friday and finished it and the neighbor was a lot different. His ranting and raving had stopped and he was relatively quiet the whole time we were there. I know it was because we had been praying for him. His whole countenance was changed, he was a lot happier to see us and more welcoming since it was "his neighborhood". I think there is a chance that some other volunteers will be helping him with the properties around there that he is taking care of. What was the most sad is that he just kept saying "They don't care, they just don't care God!", not about us, but about everyone else in general. I think he really appreciated what we were doing, since he hadn't seen anyone else doing it.
Wednesday and Thursday I don't really remember as individual days. I know that Wednesday I was totally exhausted and could barely get anything done. Over those two days we moved a party boat, rock on for the "Man Flesh" and "WO-Man Flesh" that accomplished that, cleared a bunch of tree and bush debris from a house, gutted another house that was going to be demolished, and something else I honestly can't remember. It was great. You would be amazed at all that we did and all that still needs to be done. Some of what we were doing was really small, I mean pulling nails and moving bushes? How much does someone really need that done? That's what you think when you start it, but it's a big deal to the people you are doing it for. It's a big deal to them that you are there sacrificing your time and energy to do some really hard work that you aren't getting paid for. Then again some of it really was a big deal, like gutting houses. Those people can't get a new house built until their house is gutted and they can't afford for someone to come out and gut it for them. So what we did for them was a really big deal too, it means a lot to them, because we gut their home they are able to have a new one.
Going down there you really don't see a whole lot of damage left on the outside. When we got there I was kind of wondering where all this so called devastation was. A lot has been done, there are a lot of buildings and homes that are looking good now. The problem now is on the inside. Black mold has completely destroyed a lot of these homes, they look great on the outside, but when you start pulling off dry wall you see 1) how weak the dray wall is and 2) how much black mold there is. We were wearing masks the whole time because of how dangerous it was. And you wouldn't even know it until you start taking it apart.
Hey if you're reading this and thinking this sounded kinda cool, you should really go sometime. Even just for a few days, it's worth it. The Katrina disaster is still very much a reality for the people in the Gulf area. We have the luxury of forgetting about it because the only thing that still effects us from the hurricane is the price of gas. There are tons of people still living in trailers because no one will help them anymore. People don't care, so it's up to us to start caring again and go and take care of our own people, and by our example maybe the nation will start to care again too. Big hope huh? A little irrational? Maybe, but we certainly can't afford to put a limit on God and what he can do. God can use one person to change the heart of a nation. He can use one group of people, people like us, to change the heart of a nation, to make that nation remember to care for it's people no matter how different they are. So if you are able, find some one to go with and just do it.
If you are interested in going with our group there is talk of going on a three week trip sometime this summer, and they also for for a week over Thanksgiving break, one or two weeks over winter break and then the week for spring break. There is plenty of opportunity, so you have no excuse on that end ;)
Ok, so the long version, which won't be that long because the whole week just ran together and I can't remember what we did when, and I don't have much time to do this anyway. So hear goes.
We caravanned (sp?) to Miss. with three vehicles and had just a major blast getting down there. We drove straight through and the one stint that I drove, through Dallas Texas, I got lost for an hour. That was an adventure. If you are a Dallas driver I have this to say to you: SHAME ON YOU! GO TO ANOTHER STATE AND LEARN HOW TO DRIVE! I have never had to deal with such rude and aggressive drivers, it was irritating. But also fun because it was an adventure. The highway system there is seriously a total labyrinth, if you don't live there, there is no way you're going to find your way around. It was pretty incredible.
So we got to Camp Gospel Sunday afternoon, about an hour before we had planned to be there and had sort of an orientation and then spent the rest of the day on the beach. We were only a stone's throw away from the beach, it was fantastic. The water there is soooo warm, lots of jelly fish, no sharks, it was good. Later on in the week I went with a group of the guys all the way out to the post that said "Danger (something else I don't remember)" on it, that was fun. I think the drop off point was right around there. It was like a quarter or so mile out in the ocean and the water wasn't above my head yet. You know what a feat that is right? When I go to the pool five feet deep is pushing it for me keeping my head above water.
Monday we started working. We had such a large group between the Colorado Springs UCCS people and the Pueblo CSUP people (and a few from Boulder too), that we had to split up the groups. There were 36 of us total and we split up into two groups of 18. One group went to New Orleans (which ended up not working out, but you'll have to talk to one of them to get the whole story, it was pretty awesome), and then my group stayed in Pass Christian and pulled nails all day. Now pulling nails doesn't sound particularly exciting, I know, and honestly it was pretty monotonous, but this guy that we were doing it for had found all these boards that were just going to be thrown away and decided to keep them because it was such a waste. Well, once all the nails are pulled out (there was a lot of wood, we spent all day there and got through maybe a quarter of it), he is going to build a house for himself and his daughter and anyone else that needs a new house. Sweet huh? So it was worth it.
Tuesday my team went to New Orleans to do the house the other team was supposed to do on Monday but couldn't. We had to gut the entire house, it was quite an experience, especially in the not-so-safe neighborhood that we were in, with the "crazy" neighbor. The neighbor was the most interesting part of the house, he was ranting and raving the whole time we were there, it was a bit scary, so I stayed away from him. We ended up leaving the house unfinished, but we came back Friday and finished it and the neighbor was a lot different. His ranting and raving had stopped and he was relatively quiet the whole time we were there. I know it was because we had been praying for him. His whole countenance was changed, he was a lot happier to see us and more welcoming since it was "his neighborhood". I think there is a chance that some other volunteers will be helping him with the properties around there that he is taking care of. What was the most sad is that he just kept saying "They don't care, they just don't care God!", not about us, but about everyone else in general. I think he really appreciated what we were doing, since he hadn't seen anyone else doing it.
Wednesday and Thursday I don't really remember as individual days. I know that Wednesday I was totally exhausted and could barely get anything done. Over those two days we moved a party boat, rock on for the "Man Flesh" and "WO-Man Flesh" that accomplished that, cleared a bunch of tree and bush debris from a house, gutted another house that was going to be demolished, and something else I honestly can't remember. It was great. You would be amazed at all that we did and all that still needs to be done. Some of what we were doing was really small, I mean pulling nails and moving bushes? How much does someone really need that done? That's what you think when you start it, but it's a big deal to the people you are doing it for. It's a big deal to them that you are there sacrificing your time and energy to do some really hard work that you aren't getting paid for. Then again some of it really was a big deal, like gutting houses. Those people can't get a new house built until their house is gutted and they can't afford for someone to come out and gut it for them. So what we did for them was a really big deal too, it means a lot to them, because we gut their home they are able to have a new one.
Going down there you really don't see a whole lot of damage left on the outside. When we got there I was kind of wondering where all this so called devastation was. A lot has been done, there are a lot of buildings and homes that are looking good now. The problem now is on the inside. Black mold has completely destroyed a lot of these homes, they look great on the outside, but when you start pulling off dry wall you see 1) how weak the dray wall is and 2) how much black mold there is. We were wearing masks the whole time because of how dangerous it was. And you wouldn't even know it until you start taking it apart.
Hey if you're reading this and thinking this sounded kinda cool, you should really go sometime. Even just for a few days, it's worth it. The Katrina disaster is still very much a reality for the people in the Gulf area. We have the luxury of forgetting about it because the only thing that still effects us from the hurricane is the price of gas. There are tons of people still living in trailers because no one will help them anymore. People don't care, so it's up to us to start caring again and go and take care of our own people, and by our example maybe the nation will start to care again too. Big hope huh? A little irrational? Maybe, but we certainly can't afford to put a limit on God and what he can do. God can use one person to change the heart of a nation. He can use one group of people, people like us, to change the heart of a nation, to make that nation remember to care for it's people no matter how different they are. So if you are able, find some one to go with and just do it.
If you are interested in going with our group there is talk of going on a three week trip sometime this summer, and they also for for a week over Thanksgiving break, one or two weeks over winter break and then the week for spring break. There is plenty of opportunity, so you have no excuse on that end ;)
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